Wise friends gave me warning that this particular holiday season, the first spent without my mother, would be difficult. I listened, because that is what good friends do, so it came as no shock to find that all the things that I find joy in at this time of year are bittersweet. No one loved Christmas or snow like my mother and she shared that appreciation with me every Winter of my life. No snowfall happened without a phone call, and in her later years as her eyesight failed she would call just to check and see if maybe it might be snowing. She couldn't see the snow, but that didn't stop her from wishing it would.
As I have said frequently here, I have found the grieving process to be a strange little journey. Most of the legal loose ends are finally nearing completion and I'm beginning to let go of the anger and frustration many of her choices and how they impacted my life and her death. And now I am beginning to miss her. I wondered if I ever would. The best gift that Hospice has given me is the truth that grief has no time table. We all feel what we feel, when we feel it and there is no shame in that.
Despite the moments of reflection and sadness, it is still the holiday season and I continue to celebrate in my quiet way. A few Christmas discoveries:
First up is Winter Magic
- Hayley Westenra. I first discovered Hayley in a random search for
waltz music and found her Dark Waltz. (Still a huge favorite.) She
was, perhaps still is, one of the Celtic Woman. Her voice is clear and
well suited to holiday music. Song of note: The Little Road to
Bethlehem. It makes me forgive her for a not so wonderful arrangement
of River.
The Annie Moses Band was
a completely new find for me and what a find. This family is so
talented....I can't even find the words. I chose This Glorious
Christmas, but there are a few other Christmas albums that I'm sure are
equally wonderful. I expected some Celtic flavor, and there is a bit of
that, but this album has an almost Aaron Copeland feel to it. Song of
note: When the Christmas Baby Cries.
This weekend Amazing Husband took me to see A Christmas Carol
at the IMAX 3D. It wasn't high up on the movie viewing list, but we
both needed a little blast of Christmas spirit and decided to make the
annual pilgrimage to Madison for mutt gifts. Why not take in the IMAX
while we were there? Visually it was beyond belief. Every single
surface was perfectly crafted. Even the fires in the fireplaces moved
and cracked. I was quite impressed. A lot of the dialog was taken
directly from the original text, which I thought took it up a notch
from the usual Disney fair. I wouldn't say that this was a movie
appropriate for very young children, just as the book would not be.
There were places that were just plain scary. The depiction of when
Scrooge first meets Marley's ghost was was creepily suspenseful. I
probably wouldn't see it again, but I did enjoy it. It was the first
time I've been to a 3D film where the entire film, including the ending
credits, was in 3D.
The local weather people say that snow is coming, perhaps feet of it. I hope they are correct. Stay warm and safe!
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